What if your PCPs could talk...

[LessMundane]

and did not know you were listening?

 

"Look what the cat dragged in" and "no legs to stand on" were not warm welcomes.

It has gotten worse, "Leshiy, is that a he or she?" "Looks like a real lightweight" "Well, that grip looks like lipstick"

So, unfortunately, the nickname stuck; "Lipstick".

I'm picking up on what seems to be old fashion sibling rivalry.

"When was the last time you rode in the golf cart?" Answer..."Not since Lipstick arrived"

(note: Riding in the golf cart is serious business. It is the most comfortable place to sit while picking off Grays in the pecan trees. Everybody with 250 bar & loaded with JSBs wants to go.)

I am sure there is more to come.

 

[Peskådot671]

They would all say that I'm not spending enough time with them and that I'm always working. What a bunch of attention hungry ho's!

 

[Odoyle]

My reg really wants to creep!!!

Quit unscrewing my bottle when you put me away!!!

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Why do you only keep 3000psi in me?

I want to leak and do funny things to your reg too.

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I really wanna be tinkered with!!!

Stop neglecting me I wanna wreak havoc and give you problems!!!

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Why do you crank my power down? So what if I'm too loud? So what if I'm super easy to shoot and take and better accuracy potential on lower power? So what if you get tons more shots?

I wanna be stressed out!!! I wanna make you cry after I'm broken!!! Max me out max me out max me out!!!

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Stop giving lame excuses you don't want to take me hunting in the field just because I'm too pretty. 

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Why do you store me on low pressure and deliberately not fill me up when I'm put away?

I wanna leak I wanna leak I wanna leak!!!

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Why do you never remove my shroud or barrel when cleaning it changing breech seals?

I wanna give you accuracy inconsistency swings like the first couple times!!!

 

[flytraps]

Get two then you will have twins. Then they can't say they don't have anything in common. Like the new addition. The older ones are saying only if I were new again. 

 

[cea1960]

Look at the new gal he's been spending all his time with. She thinks she's so pretty with that custom hydro dip. She looks like a $5 whore!

Oh Maxine, your just jealous because your plain synthetic stock. 

Up your bore! We'll see how good she looks after 20,000 pellets and countless walks in the woods!

 

[wyshadow]

My guns would say, "I wish I could shoot for him because today he can't shoot for s%!t"

 

[vmaxpro]

“ I have a headache, leave me alone...”

 

[SDellinger]

They say alot when they are at the dairy! 

Have fun, Scott

 

[JungleShooter]

SlugGun talking with PelletGun:

(I pretended to forget my cellphone on the shooting bench — and I had the voice recorder running... ).





PelletGun: "You're such a rule breaker! Everybody knows that airguns should use pellets — and those slugs or what they're really called — those bullets — are only for the power burners! You're gonna get us all banned or something worse!"



SlugGun: "You're just jealous that Matthias spent $500 on NSA and H&N slugs last month! And for you he only spent $200 on pellets."



PelletGun: "Nothing to envy there, you slugger, you splurger! You're just plain wasteful, so much money down your .22 tube! Matthias is going to tire of you in a hurry when his wife sees the charge on the credit card!"



SlugGun: "At least I don't have constipation issues with slugs going though my system — unlike you with your ridiculously tight choke!"



PelletGun: "Better tight-choked than a big-mouthed like you! You blow out so much air... — only to get your overweight slugs up to speed.... With all the air you're wasting, guess who is going to kill Matthias' back so he won't be able to take us hunting anymore?! You big-mouthed airwaster require him to fill your 500cc bottle with a hand pump — that is just cruel!"



SlugGun: "But hey, look at the bright sight of things. Matthias is going to get so tired of using the hand pump that he will simply have to buy a big air tank. Then both you and me get to enjoy the luxuries of a clean pressure tank filling instead of the polluted humid air coming from that hand pump! I really hope he'll get us a Great White!"



PelletGun: "You're right. I didn't think about that. I'm sorry I got on your case there for a moment. There's enough room in the airguniverse for both of us to exist. It's just that the slug wave came so quickly, no-one saw it coming, so I'm still trying to get used to it.

Hey, as long as Matthias gets us that air tank, well, then.... let's be friends and shoot the breeze." 



SlugGun: "Yes, and some bulls, too!"







————————————————————————————————————





Well, what do I do NOW?!

If I don't give them the Great White, they'll bicker again. And have you ever seen a bickering gun shoot straight? They DO, out of 10 shots they shoot 5 straight flyers!!  



Hopefully this recording will convince my wife that I NEED that air tank for Christmas...! 



Matthias



PS: For Christmas all I want is world peace. And let's start making peace between those two airguns. Let's get them a Great White so that we'll be able to sing "Silent night — sleep in heavenly peace!" 

(to write "shoot in heavenly peace" just didn't seem right...)

 

[Dingfelder]

You were all over my butt before the new girl came in, and now you're too good for me?