Life in the 55 + community

[socaloldman]

About 45 days ago we woke up to a mad raucous crow fight in the back yard. What the hell is going on? Seems Mr. and Mrs. Crow were making a baby. They then built a nice condo deep inside the neighbor’s tree and for weeks have been drinking, panhandling, carousing and generally crapping on everyone and thing in sight. 

Now these aren’t your little small hill country crows. These are the giant first cousins of Alaskan Ravens. Tribes worshipped these corvids! Their newborn popped out 90% full grown. Talk about a whiny egg sucking noisy little pissant! He is the worst. 

They are now in the yard scratching around and the damn cat is scared. This know it all bossy vile Siamese razor clawed machine is hiding in the bushes.

I cannot shoot and my Streamline is locked away. The neighbors are all ooowing and aawing over the little brat. 

The local highshoes pass by regularly so between them and the old ladies keeping watch what can a person do…

I had to watch the New Zealand rugby team, stomp on South Africa to calm down.

Ask the great Tlingit indian god to take them away.

 

[Hotbrass]

Ha Ha Ha, not in a good way. I have pigeons roosting under my solar panels. They, coo coo, coo, at first light. They s#1t everywhere, on the house, trailer, neighbors, they fly and s#1t. I have not put an end to this crap because of my neighbors. If they did not mind, the RAW would clean up the messers. GGGRRRRRRRRRRRRR

 

[Crusher]

Buy a falcon

 

[likkitysplyt]

Not to worry my friends, things may look pretty bleak right now and I know you are thinking that this is gonna take forever to fix with neighbors like you have … just remember that a journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tire … and when you've finally had enough of your neighbors autistic lifestyle and decide the take matters in your own hands and draw a bead on those pesky critters from the bushes … remember … don't squat with your spurs on. 

 

[T3PRanch]

Crows HATE Owls. An Owl Decoy will draw them to it and give an opportunity to dispatch the critters

 

[Kyler]

get a better silencer and practice saying "Officer, I have no idea who shot them."

 

[jking]

That's funny Socaloldman. I think you have a writing future, kinda reminded me Patrick Mcmanus from the older Outdoor Life magazines. I like him so much I bought two of his books full of out doorsy short stories. Lots of chuckles.
jimmy

 

[Kim]

I have one of these (with a pivoting head like Linda Blair). It doesn't work! All the same birds and rodents that frequent our property welcome him.

However the birds do go nuts when there is a live owl, hawk, and especially bobcat. In fact one way to see the bobcats is to look for what is making the crows go nuts - flying, vocalizing, dive bombing. They harass any threat to their nests.

 

[ashes5]

Did you hear of one of those rubber band ball bearing tossers. We call them sling shots hear in the states. If you never hit them by the time you get good with it you will of scared them off. Watch the ricochets. Them bearings bounce like hell when they hit wood.

 

[T3PRanch]

Yes and if you miss your shot and the trajectory takes the "ball bearing" into a neighbors car, house, pet or visiting grandkid nobody will be angry right!

 

[socaloldman]

ashes5, My sister taught me how to shoot a slingshot when I was 4 years old. Said stand behind me and watch what I do. She put a big ol rock aboard and held the crooked stick steady stretched the rubber way out front and let fly. perfect hit! right in the middle of my forehead. knocked me out, put huge knot on my head and cured me of those weapons at the age of four!!

 

[socaloldman]

Thanks Jking, one of my earlier scribes sorely raised the fur of several of the guys. So I don't talk anymore about disappearing pets and the local 4 legged population controller. 

 

[Trailryder42]

"Kyler"get a better silencer and practice saying "Officer, I have no idea who shot them."

Officer- "How did you know they were shot? I didn't say they were shot".

Oops.