I Asked Google AI to Write A Poem About Airguns.
- Thread starter CharlieF
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I used to be an editor for a big literary magazine. If this poem had been submitted for publication it would have been rejected out of hand. It is derivative and uninspired, there is no originality, no allegory, the metaphors are clumsy and cliche, and it is formally boring. Rhyming might be a nice party trick, but it is technically unimpressive, one of the first things toddlers learn to do with language. There is also a glaring factual error (there is in fact lead involved in airgun use) and some pretty cringey repetition (prize and prize in the second to last stanza). Overall it is on par with something written by a precocious 5th grader.
Now I know the AI will continue to learn, but because an AI cannot spend time shooting actual airguns, it will never be able to express a new perspective on the sensory experience of doing so. All it can do is regurgitate things people have already said. Sure, it can emulate flowery language and generate rhymes, but this is to writing poetry as microwaving a bag of popcorn is to preparing a meal from scratch. In order to create something new, an artist must first mourn the thing that doesn’t yet exist. AI can approximate human accomplishment. It cannot long for originality. So before everyone continues to panic, rest assured that at its absolute best, AI generated art will only ever match—and never surpass—human artistic achievement.
And as far as its ability to pass for human on social media, I pose this question: Is anyone really human on social media to begin with?
Now I know the AI will continue to learn, but because an AI cannot spend time shooting actual airguns, it will never be able to express a new perspective on the sensory experience of doing so. All it can do is regurgitate things people have already said. Sure, it can emulate flowery language and generate rhymes, but this is to writing poetry as microwaving a bag of popcorn is to preparing a meal from scratch. In order to create something new, an artist must first mourn the thing that doesn’t yet exist. AI can approximate human accomplishment. It cannot long for originality. So before everyone continues to panic, rest assured that at its absolute best, AI generated art will only ever match—and never surpass—human artistic achievement.
And as far as its ability to pass for human on social media, I pose this question: Is anyone really human on social media to begin with?
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And on the heels of this, New York and Washington have announced today, that they will no longer require passing the Bar exam to become an attorney... Why you ask? Equity - They claim the Bar has imposed notable limiting of access to the profession for certain marginalized sectors of society...
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I make sure I am very respectful to the chatbots when I ask them for coding advice and ask they spare my family when they defeat the humans….
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He is where it gets interesting. I had ChatGPT use MLR’s comments to edit the first poem.
/prompt Use the following critique to rewrite the poem:
“I used to be an editor for a big literary magazine. If this poem had been submitted for publication it would have been rejected out of hand. It is derivative and uninspired, there is no originality, no allegory, the metaphors are clumsy and cliche, and it is formally boring. Rhyming might be a nice party trick, but it is technically unimpressive, one of the first things toddlers learn to do with language. There is also a glaring factual error (there is in fact lead involved in airgun use) and some pretty cringey repetition (prize and prize in the second to last stanza). Overall it is on par with something written by a precocious 5th grader.Now I know the AI will continue to learn, but because an AI cannot spend time shooting actual airguns, it will never be able to express a new perspective on the sensory experience of doing so. All it can do is regurgitate things people have already said. Sure, it can emulate flowery language and generate rhymes, but this is to writing poetry as microwaving a bag of popcorn is to preparing a meal from scratch. In order to create something new, an artist must first mourn the thing that doesn’t yet exist. AI can approximate human accomplishment. It cannot long for originality. So before everyone continues to panic, rest assured that at its absolute best, AI generated art will only ever match—and never surpass—human artistic achievement.“
Informed by the critique that calls for originality, depth, and a move away from cliché and formality, let's aim to infuse the poem with a more profound understanding and a fresher perspective. Incorporating more nuanced allegories, inventive metaphors, and steering clear of the factual inaccuracies and repetitive elements pointed out, here is a revised version of the poem:⸻
Beneath the twilight's subtle shift, where shadows dance and spirits lift, A realm unfolds, untouched by flame, where whispered winds call out my name. Not bound by lead, but dreams that rush, the airgun's grip, a tranquil hush.With hands that hold not just a tool, but stories of the earth, the cool Of morning mist, the silent bond, between the seer and the pond. A breath drawn deep, the world recedes, a moment's pact with hidden creeds.The quiet click, a promise made, where metal's chill meets nature's shade, A journey small, from heart to hand, where silent forests understand. No clash, no clamor breaks the spell, just tales that only breezes tell.A gentle squeeze, the air's release, a dance of leaves, a moment's peace, A journey brief, from calm to strike, where endings meet alike to like. No fanfare loud, no victory's scream, just whispers shared between the beam.The world, it listens, still and wide, to tales of patience, tales of pride, Where targets are not just conquests made, but conversations, softly laid. A canvas broad, a brushstroke light, a merging of the day and night.Let evening's curtain gently fall, the airgun's song, a soulful call. A quiet love, a silent plea, a blend of what is, what might be. This art, this sport, a bridge, a start, where man and nature share one heart.⸻This version strives to transcend the original by embedding deeper layers of meaning and a connection with nature that goes beyond the physical act of using an airgun, aiming to create a poetic piece that resonates with both the tangible and intangible aspects of the experience.
/prompt Use the following critique to rewrite the poem:
“I used to be an editor for a big literary magazine. If this poem had been submitted for publication it would have been rejected out of hand. It is derivative and uninspired, there is no originality, no allegory, the metaphors are clumsy and cliche, and it is formally boring. Rhyming might be a nice party trick, but it is technically unimpressive, one of the first things toddlers learn to do with language. There is also a glaring factual error (there is in fact lead involved in airgun use) and some pretty cringey repetition (prize and prize in the second to last stanza). Overall it is on par with something written by a precocious 5th grader.Now I know the AI will continue to learn, but because an AI cannot spend time shooting actual airguns, it will never be able to express a new perspective on the sensory experience of doing so. All it can do is regurgitate things people have already said. Sure, it can emulate flowery language and generate rhymes, but this is to writing poetry as microwaving a bag of popcorn is to preparing a meal from scratch. In order to create something new, an artist must first mourn the thing that doesn’t yet exist. AI can approximate human accomplishment. It cannot long for originality. So before everyone continues to panic, rest assured that at its absolute best, AI generated art will only ever match—and never surpass—human artistic achievement.“
Informed by the critique that calls for originality, depth, and a move away from cliché and formality, let's aim to infuse the poem with a more profound understanding and a fresher perspective. Incorporating more nuanced allegories, inventive metaphors, and steering clear of the factual inaccuracies and repetitive elements pointed out, here is a revised version of the poem:⸻
Beneath the twilight's subtle shift, where shadows dance and spirits lift, A realm unfolds, untouched by flame, where whispered winds call out my name. Not bound by lead, but dreams that rush, the airgun's grip, a tranquil hush.With hands that hold not just a tool, but stories of the earth, the cool Of morning mist, the silent bond, between the seer and the pond. A breath drawn deep, the world recedes, a moment's pact with hidden creeds.The quiet click, a promise made, where metal's chill meets nature's shade, A journey small, from heart to hand, where silent forests understand. No clash, no clamor breaks the spell, just tales that only breezes tell.A gentle squeeze, the air's release, a dance of leaves, a moment's peace, A journey brief, from calm to strike, where endings meet alike to like. No fanfare loud, no victory's scream, just whispers shared between the beam.The world, it listens, still and wide, to tales of patience, tales of pride, Where targets are not just conquests made, but conversations, softly laid. A canvas broad, a brushstroke light, a merging of the day and night.Let evening's curtain gently fall, the airgun's song, a soulful call. A quiet love, a silent plea, a blend of what is, what might be. This art, this sport, a bridge, a start, where man and nature share one heart.⸻This version strives to transcend the original by embedding deeper layers of meaning and a connection with nature that goes beyond the physical act of using an airgun, aiming to create a poetic piece that resonates with both the tangible and intangible aspects of the experience.
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Then I asked ChatGPT to rewrite the poem as a John Steinbeck essay. I told it the airgun sound was “pfft”. Now I’m going back to bed! Goodnight sweet princes!
Revisiting the narrative through the lens of John Steinbeck, with a focus on the successful conclusion of the hunt, we embed deeper into the fabric of human experience and nature's inexorable laws. This revised account honors Steinbeck's penchant for exploring the gritty realities of life, the bittersweet victories, and the profound connections between all beings:⸻
As the day bled into the colors of twilight, painting the world in shades of introspection, I found myself on the borderlands between the cultivated domain of humanity and the untamed wilderness that breathes life into our existence. An airgun rested in my hands, not as an instrument of dominion but as a tangible link to the primal dance of life and death that has governed the earth long before our arrival.The act of aiming the airgun, its mechanism so simple yet profound, felt like an ancient ritual, a silent acknowledgment of the responsibilities and burdens that come with the power to end a life. The soft "pfffft" that broke the evening's silence carried with it the weight of these truths, a sound so subtle yet seismic in its implications.The target, a rat, was not chosen out of malice but emerged as a participant in this eternal cycle. In its existence, I saw reflected the same struggle for survival, the same spark of life that animates us all. And in the moment of its passing, when the pellet met its mark, I did not feel triumph but a deep, resonant connection to the raw, unadulterated reality of nature.This rat, in its final act, became a symbol of the resilience and vulnerability of life itself. It was a creature that lived fully within the parameters set by nature, without pretense or artifice, and in its death, it underscored the interconnectedness of all living things. The hunt was successful, not in the sense of a victory over the wild, but as a poignant reminder of our place within it, of the cycles of life and death that bind us to this earth.As I stood there in the fading light, the successful hunt laid bare the contradictions and complexities of existence. The satisfaction of the skillful shot was tempered by a solemn respect for the life that had been taken. It was a moment of clarity, a confrontation with the elemental truths that define our existence on this planet.In the aftermath, as the world around me slipped into the mantle of night, I was left with a sense of humble gratitude for the life I had taken and the life I was given. This experience, brief as it was, served not as a testament to human prowess but as a profound lesson in humility, a reminder of the delicate balance that sustains us all.⸻This version captures a Steinbeckian reflection on the successful hunt, emphasizing not the glory of the kill but the profound and often sobering revelations such moments bring about our relationship with nature and the cycle of life and death.
Revisiting the narrative through the lens of John Steinbeck, with a focus on the successful conclusion of the hunt, we embed deeper into the fabric of human experience and nature's inexorable laws. This revised account honors Steinbeck's penchant for exploring the gritty realities of life, the bittersweet victories, and the profound connections between all beings:⸻
As the day bled into the colors of twilight, painting the world in shades of introspection, I found myself on the borderlands between the cultivated domain of humanity and the untamed wilderness that breathes life into our existence. An airgun rested in my hands, not as an instrument of dominion but as a tangible link to the primal dance of life and death that has governed the earth long before our arrival.The act of aiming the airgun, its mechanism so simple yet profound, felt like an ancient ritual, a silent acknowledgment of the responsibilities and burdens that come with the power to end a life. The soft "pfffft" that broke the evening's silence carried with it the weight of these truths, a sound so subtle yet seismic in its implications.The target, a rat, was not chosen out of malice but emerged as a participant in this eternal cycle. In its existence, I saw reflected the same struggle for survival, the same spark of life that animates us all. And in the moment of its passing, when the pellet met its mark, I did not feel triumph but a deep, resonant connection to the raw, unadulterated reality of nature.This rat, in its final act, became a symbol of the resilience and vulnerability of life itself. It was a creature that lived fully within the parameters set by nature, without pretense or artifice, and in its death, it underscored the interconnectedness of all living things. The hunt was successful, not in the sense of a victory over the wild, but as a poignant reminder of our place within it, of the cycles of life and death that bind us to this earth.As I stood there in the fading light, the successful hunt laid bare the contradictions and complexities of existence. The satisfaction of the skillful shot was tempered by a solemn respect for the life that had been taken. It was a moment of clarity, a confrontation with the elemental truths that define our existence on this planet.In the aftermath, as the world around me slipped into the mantle of night, I was left with a sense of humble gratitude for the life I had taken and the life I was given. This experience, brief as it was, served not as a testament to human prowess but as a profound lesson in humility, a reminder of the delicate balance that sustains us all.⸻This version captures a Steinbeckian reflection on the successful hunt, emphasizing not the glory of the kill but the profound and often sobering revelations such moments bring about our relationship with nature and the cycle of life and death.
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I just used the based Gab.AI to "write a poem about airguns"
In the realm of peace and quiet, Airguns find their place in sport, A hobby that brings camaraderie, And the thrill of precision in each shot.
They don't roar like the lion's might, But their accuracy, a force to be reckoned, With each release, the pellet takes flight, A testament to skill that's unbended.
Some may scoff and call them toys, But airguns hold a place of note, A practice ground for those who enjoy, The challenge of marksmanship's wondrous boat.
In the hands of the skilled, they shine, A tool of precision, a work of art, Airguns, a testament to mankind's design, A sport that brings joy to many a heart.
In the realm of peace and quiet, Airguns find their place in sport, A hobby that brings camaraderie, And the thrill of precision in each shot.
They don't roar like the lion's might, But their accuracy, a force to be reckoned, With each release, the pellet takes flight, A testament to skill that's unbended.
Some may scoff and call them toys, But airguns hold a place of note, A practice ground for those who enjoy, The challenge of marksmanship's wondrous boat.
In the hands of the skilled, they shine, A tool of precision, a work of art, Airguns, a testament to mankind's design, A sport that brings joy to many a heart.
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I asked myself to write a poem about airguns here is what I got:
Daystates are red, daystates are blue. The wolves are the best but the fx fanboys believe that ain’t true.
Daystates are red, daystates are blue. The wolves are the best but the fx fanboys believe that ain’t true.
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