Given the steady stream of posts on this forum by newbies and experienced airgunners alike on subject(s) relating to airgun weirdnesses, thought this might be a timely opportunity to quote the Voice Of Experience. Some of It's more profoundly memorable quotes-
1) "Airguns are like people. Each has it's own quirks, foibles and idiosyncrasies. And although those three terms are largely synonymous, when talking airguns or people, the three terms are NOT redundant!"
2) "Airguns develop problems or issues for any number of reasons... or no reason at all!"
3) "Airguns are no more schizophrenic than gorgeous red-heads... on crack!"
4) "Airguns are no more psychotic than my fourth ex-wife; who I left after the third time she stabbed me. Damn I miss that girl!"
5) "Why did I buy a springer? Because since I left my fourth ex-wife after the third time she stabbed me there's a whole in my soul marked 'Aggravation'."
6) "Under the definition of 'schizophrenic' in the Websters dictionary there's an image of a spring-piston airgun."
7) "Under the definition of 'psychotic' in the Websters dictionary there's an image of a cheap spring-piston airgun. And an image of my fourth ex-wife."
8) "Want to lose a friend? Help them buy an airgun."
9) "Want to make an enemy? Broker an airgun transaction for a friend."
10) "Want to avoid damage claims when shipping airguns? Package them in such a way as to make it IMPOSSIBLE for package-handling apes bent on destroying the contents to succeed."
11) "Shipping claims are to be avoided at all costs. My one and only damage claim took NINE MONTHS OF AGGRAVATION to settle."
12) "Want to avoid incompetent and/or agenda-driven postal or shipping company clerks refusing to accept your package? Take a printed copy of their company and federal regulations on shipping airguns with you. If a clerk still refuses after you've provided inarguable evidence of her lies, ask for her supervisor."
13) "Want to have as much fun as possible with airguns and Humans? See #12 above."
14) "I used to be normal; then got into airguns."
1) "Airguns are like people. Each has it's own quirks, foibles and idiosyncrasies. And although those three terms are largely synonymous, when talking airguns or people, the three terms are NOT redundant!"
2) "Airguns develop problems or issues for any number of reasons... or no reason at all!"
3) "Airguns are no more schizophrenic than gorgeous red-heads... on crack!"
4) "Airguns are no more psychotic than my fourth ex-wife; who I left after the third time she stabbed me. Damn I miss that girl!"
5) "Why did I buy a springer? Because since I left my fourth ex-wife after the third time she stabbed me there's a whole in my soul marked 'Aggravation'."
6) "Under the definition of 'schizophrenic' in the Websters dictionary there's an image of a spring-piston airgun."
7) "Under the definition of 'psychotic' in the Websters dictionary there's an image of a cheap spring-piston airgun. And an image of my fourth ex-wife."
8) "Want to lose a friend? Help them buy an airgun."
9) "Want to make an enemy? Broker an airgun transaction for a friend."
10) "Want to avoid damage claims when shipping airguns? Package them in such a way as to make it IMPOSSIBLE for package-handling apes bent on destroying the contents to succeed."
11) "Shipping claims are to be avoided at all costs. My one and only damage claim took NINE MONTHS OF AGGRAVATION to settle."
12) "Want to avoid incompetent and/or agenda-driven postal or shipping company clerks refusing to accept your package? Take a printed copy of their company and federal regulations on shipping airguns with you. If a clerk still refuses after you've provided inarguable evidence of her lies, ask for her supervisor."
13) "Want to have as much fun as possible with airguns and Humans? See #12 above."
14) "I used to be normal; then got into airguns."
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